safety

Safe words- aka traffic light system and why it’s my favourite

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Safe words- aka traffic light system and why it’s my favourite

Safe words are just that, words that we use to be able to call (or stop) a scene when we need to, to make a scene safe for us to be vulnerable in and perhaps push our boundaries in a way that feels controlled. 

Safe words are used to relay information regarding how someone is fairing in a kink scene, or for a top to check in with a submissive or bottom whilst in a kink scene. Safe words are words we use to indicate when we need play to stop, or keep going. These can take a variety of form and are often used because when playing with kink, words like stop, might not mean stop. 

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The catharsis of pain and grieving- a beatdown story

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The catharsis of pain and grieving- a beatdown story

This session, he wanted his first beat down experience. Perhaps when you think of beat downs you think of slapping and punching, there was indeed, plenty of both of these in our time together. There was, however, a plethora of intimacy. 

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The joy of playing with a well trained Submissive

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The joy of playing with a well trained Submissive

It is a true delight when a submissive does mean “Do whatever makes you happy Mistress”. When they have really thought about their boundaries and comes to the table (I literally do my pre session negotiations around a table) with knowledge of their bodies limits and their hard and soft limits and can say “I want to do whatever makes you happy Mistress.” It is literal joy to my ears.

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Hard limits

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Hard limits

Hard limits are things (be they actions, words, items or spaces) which an individual does not wish to use in kinky play. A hard limit could be literally anything, some of the most common ones I have come across when negotiating play scenes have been: tickling; spitting; blood; humiliation; pain; golden showers; caning; claustrophobia… 

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